Q&A with ASH

I always loved music and performing since I was a kid so growing up I would always join whatever arts activities there were like choir, musicals, talent competitions, etc. I also played classical piano since I was four and tinkered around with teaching myself guitar, bass, and drums in my teens. But I guess with academic and professional pressures, I didn’t take it seriously as something I could pursue, just as something I loved as an extracurricular. It wasn’t until the pandemic, when I took a gap year and had time to rest and reflect on my purpose in life, did I really get started on my path in music. That’s when I first taught myself production and tried writing original music!

Some of biggest musical influences are FKA twigs, Sade, and Frank Ocean.

The artists I mentioned above all have had a major influence on my music style. I think FKA twigs and Frank Ocean, as some of the first artists I fell in love with, definitely helped shape my sonic understanding, which inspires me to create intimate, atmospheric worlds the way they do. Sade and artists like SZA, though also sonic influences, have more potently influenced my songwriting, lyricism, and melodic development.

I think a big one is going to LA to work at EastWest Studios with my mixing engineer Jeff Ellis, who has worked with some of my favorite artists like Frank Ocean, Doja Cat, and Kali Uchis. It was my first major industry collaboration and major studio experience, and I got to interact with a lot of cool people in the industry. I think it really solidified my confidence in the path I’m taking and sparked a grander excitement for the possibilities to come.

I tend to bottle up my inner thoughts and feelings, both as preference and habit, and though it’s trained me to be introspective, it has also left me feeling isolated. Music became the avenue in which I found I could release this inner pressure most freely and naturally with others. Through making music, not only can I ground my overly analytical thoughts into tangible lyrics, but also I am forcing myself to tap into my emotions to create something beautiful rather than minimize or rationalize them for comfort. It’s been so unbelievably healing to find this outlet of self-expression and it has allowed me to connect with others so much more.

I think one of the biggest challenges we face as female musicians in the industry is the pressure for perfection in order for our music to be taken seriously. In addition to making good music, female artists are often only respected if they do it with minimal help of others, are captivating stage performers, aesthetic pioneers, good role models, intelligent and charismatic and kind, while also never cracking this perfect image. I think a lot of woman feel the need to overachieve in this way, mastering as many skills as possible so no one can undermine us, but room for vulnerability and confusion is necessary for making great art. Grace and support for each other on their artistic journey can pave the way for more authentic representation and success.

I use my music as a means of reflecting on and processing my life experiences, which allows me to be open and honest about the lessons I’ve learned from them. In my music, I try to relay those lessons while also painting the emotional process I went through to get there. I hope that my music illuminates others’ introspection, providing new perspective and enlightenment on similar experiences while also serving as an outlet to release those emotions through.

I think there’s so much beauty in every little nuance of emotion that we feel, no matter how fleeting, and my creative process is all about channeling a specific moment in time and creating a world around it. My writing and producing process is all driven by the core emotion that I’m trying to capture. I usually like to create the emotion sonically first in my production because it places me in the right atmosphere, then I just lean into putting it all into words and a narrative.

Holding Water is my very first project as an artist so it really calcifies my journey through some of my earliest experiences in life. Each song in the project releases an old knot of something I’d been holding onto in my mind and body. In processing my experiences through music making, I learned that letting go of my need for emotional control was the only thing that could create the mental clarity I craved. Holding Water illustrates this notion of transience and acceptance of emotion’s everflowing nature.